It’s 12.21.12, so does that mean we made it, or will everything implode when the clock strikes midnight tonight? Since all the apocalypse parties are tonight, let’s just go with tonight. But don’t worry, I think we are going to get through this, Greenpoint!

You might find it hard to believe, but all this world ending drama was just stirred up by the media, which is strange because they never sensationalize anything. According to the BBC who interviewed Morandir Armson, a New Age Scholar, “the heightened fear around this date is, in his view and that of other experts, almost entirely due to the internet. More specifically they blame the blogosphere.”

Since Russia’s Minister of Emergency Situations said he has “’methods of monitoring what is occurring on the planet Earth,’ and that he could say with confidence that the world was not going to end,” I am officially going on the internet record to say that 12.21.12 will not be the last day on earth for all mankind, especially Greenpointers. We survived the Newtown Creek overflowing into the streets during Sandy, so we can survive pretty much anything. Plus, Russia would never lie to it’s citizens.

But my promise isn’t enough to quell everyone’s fears. According to a Reuter’s Poll, about 10% of people worldwide think the world could end in 2012 according to the Mayan prediction. In Greenpoint, that means about 4000 people might be losing sleep over the impending doom. The other 90% will be partying all night at one of the many local apocalypse parties, or just don’t give a shit, like real New Yorkers.

Here are our doomsday party picks:

♫ Apocalypse Party @ 285 Kent Ave, 8pm, $8, Music by Prince Rama / Dickpic /Ami Dand, All Ages, RSVP
♫ Karaoke to the End! @ Connie O’s (158 Norman Ave) 10pm, apocalyptic holiday buddy-hang at Greenpoint’s best drive bar! RSVP
♫ End of The World Party@ Glasslands (289 Kent Ave11:30pm, $10, Music by Peter Hadar & Funkbot, DJ’s, cheap drinks, Buy Tix
♫ Apocalypse Party @ Cameo Gallery (93 N 6th St) 11:55pm, $15, French electro-jazz electronic experimentalist, Joakim curates a soundtrack to end all and NYC disco king, Jacques Renault takes the stage, RSVP

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *