I am sure many of you are still digesting and can think of no worse fate than standing in a line today. So here is a round-up of 10 movies I recommend on Netflix Instant, (+ 1 bonus) rather than buying into Black Friday baloney – in no particular order.

Let me know what you think and please add to this list in the comments section:

1. Only God Forgives

Yes, every Netflix round-up WILL have a Ryan Gosling movie if I have my way, but he is NOT my favorite character in this “Bangkok Fight Club” ultra violent, gorgeously lit and impeccably scored film, which is to be expected from Nicolas Winding Refn, who also directed Drive. I will say I am more obsessed with the good (?) cop whose sick and twisted idea of punishment makes you wonder whether his brutality is worse than the crimes he avenges. And to top it all off, he is a karaoke genius.

2. Shut Up Little Man!

Best line: “If you wanna talk to me then shut you’re fuckin’ mouth.” Before there were viral videos, two college students recorded the demented arguments of their crazy next door neighbors onto cassette tapes and passed them around to friends who duplicated them until the recordings were an international cult phenomenon with comic books, plays and a few movies on the line. Rather than leaving well enough alone, the two in their middle age attempt to get releases signed in order to make a film, which brings to question the ethics and art of recording others without their knowledge then trying to make a profit.

3. This Is England

If not for the racist charged skinhead propaganda in late 80s England, watch this movie for the costume design – Doc Martins in their heyday. This film about a young teenage boy, who after losing his father in the Falklands War gets nearly indoctrinated into a Nationalist skinhead cult, so poignantly portrays the innocence of youth, then introduces a character whose tension in one moment incredibly and radically changes the entire mood of the movie. I’ve been waiting for this to show up on Instant for a while.

4. A Complete History of My Sexual Failures

This slobbish immature overgrown child of a film director whose mother still picks up after him interviews countless exes to find out why their relationship failed. Hint: it has a lot to do with psychosomatic sexual dysfunction. In one scene he takes and entire bottle of Viagra and asks strange woman to have sex with him. You will wonder why you are watching it but it’s such a train wreck you won’t be able to stop.

 

5. Lunarcy!

There are people out there who are obsessed with traveling to the moon. Would you do it? One man actually sells real estate up there – it’s pretty reasonable. You can go ahead and buy a plot right now! This movie is about believing in an impossible dream and why that is a worthwhile cause.

 

 

6. Last Train Home

You think you’re Thanksgiving travels sucked? In China during Chinese New Year, workers from the city embark on a mass exodus for one day to the countryside to visit family. They will wait a horrific 5 days for their train. It’s mind boggling to see what pains other humans take just to make a pair of denim jeans and how urban life is more valued than the country life in China, even though it tears families apart.

 

7. Fargo

Francis McDormand in all of her “ya-ah” Midwestern coffee drinking cold weather police woman glory. No need for more of a sell.

8. My Cat From Hell: Season 1

AKA Story of my life. If your cats suck, this cat whisperer will tell you why – I just thought it was cats just suck, but they have needs too. The funny thing is that each episode stars a young heterosexual couple who have just moved in together. It’s the girl’s cats and the dude hates them. Sound familiar? This series is difficult to watch if you have cats because of all the screeching sound effects. It did inspire what we are calling the “Cat Super Highway” a high vertical shelf to give our cats more surface area and relief from the narrow “hallway of confrontation.”

9. The Hours

Warning: If you don’t want your recommended list to be flooded with Period Piece Dramas with Strong Female Leads then don’t watch The Hours. If you want to be surprised by your boyfriend liking such a movie or you want to ruin his feed, watch The Hours. The movie follows the story lines of three women: the author Virginia Wolf, a depressed 50s housewife and a modern New York woman whose is throwing a big party for her dying friend. Drama is spelled with a capital D and lesbian with a capital L. (Maybe that’s why he liked it…) If anything it’s worth watching Nicole Kidman playing Virginia Wolf rocking prosthetic nose. For real – oh wait.

10. Salinger

Talk about a secretive, MIA, hermit, recluse – after writing Catcher in the Rye, author JD Salinger retreated to a Vermont cabin where he’d been allegedly writing the next best American novel for decades and decades. This documentary interviews friends, fans and colleagues about the mysterious life of this influential and curious one hit wonder.

 

BONUS: Valhalla Rising

For those of you who can’t get enough “mind-bending, violent, dark,” (as described by Netflix) movies and those directed by Nicolas Winding Refn (Drive, Only God Forgives) give Valhalla Rising a shot. It’s Gladiator meets The Road only more brutal. A deadly slave fighter named One Eye goes on a journey with the child of his former master along with Christian Crusaders, who are scared shit of him, to the New World where the natives are definitely restless.

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