picky women, a google image search

The NY Post, the most trusted source in local news, let us in on some super serious scientific data over the weekend, which proves that Brooklyn women are the pickiest daters in the country. Why? Well, it’s obvious that the men of this borough are the worst, according to two women who were disappointed by their online dates.

This data was culled from AYI.com, a dating app (has anyone used it? anyone?), which supposedly analyzed nearly half a million online dating interactions and found that Brooklyn women were the least likely to respond to messages from suitors. This online report is actually a blog post that links only to the dating site itself, so just to clarify, none of this data is actually visible, and therefore, it’s safe to assume that it is 100% accurate.

To investigate, the Post “ventured into the land of hipsters and artisinal pickles to speak to local women about why plaid shirts and scruffy beards are no longer cutting it.” After conversing with one girl in Bushwick and one in Williamsburg, this reporter concluded that online dating is difficult, because there are a lot of dumb people on the internet who only want sex. WHAT? I thought only wealthy, PhD students used AYI.com! EVERYTHING IS A LIE!

Here’s the proof:


Edna Velasco, 27, of Williamsburg, agrees. Of the 20 men she dated on OkCupid this year, only one was passable. Often she can ferret out the hopeless by their subject lines alone.

“When they start [their messages] with ‘Baby’ or ‘Honey’ — never mind! Or ‘I like Latinas!’ Delete, delete, delete!” says Velasco. “Some guy said, ‘Hello, do you like sex?’ That’s the first thing he says to me!”

During one bad date, her suitor paid for a $2 slice of pizza with pocket change — and then asked her to cough up 50 cents to cover the balance.

Oh, Edna. OHH, Edna.

Women are generally aware that when they put a picture of themselves on the internet and open the floor for proposals to “date,” a high percentage of the ensuing messages will be poorly written requests for sex time.

When someone I once knew, who shall remain anonymous (it was me) had an OkCupid profile, one man messaged her (me) asking if she (still me) would come over to his house and pretend to be Lolita. Also, he was married and decided to include that fact in the message. He was a brilliant man. 

Strangely enough, I was too picky to respond to his message.

In conclusion, the men of Brooklyn are to blame. They can’t even afford a slice of pizza!

AYI.com advises men to try the ladies of Jersey City, who are much more likely to respond to messages. AYI.com also suggests using the pick-up line, Where are you from originally?, which, they say, consistently receives the highest response rate from online daters. That line alone has gotten double the amount of responses when compared to questions that have no answers, like “what’s up” or “boobs” or ” i like u grl sex?”

We can only hope that more obscure dating apps will conduct online surveys quickly and with gusto, so that we can get to the root of this troubling issue.



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