“Do you need another dude?” I asked Dave, noticing the long line of not-so-wimpy looking guys waiting to be weighed in. I had begged my friend Miguel to compete, enticing him with cash prices and long gazes into the eyes of ferocious, possibly large, women. Miguel was ready.
“I think I’m good,” Dave said. The event was a success, enough men were willing to sacrifice their egos and possibly lose to (God no!) a woman. At the last minute, there was a drop-out and Miguel payed his $3 entry fee and would be the dark horse of the competition.
Needless to say, I entered the competition knowing I would lose but hoping I wouldn’t lose as pathetically as last time. Watch this video and see what I mean.
At first, I thought the matching wouldn’t be fair, that pound for pound men were too much stronger than women, and it would be quick and sad defeats for the females.
I was gladly mistaken. While there were a few easy knock-outs from both sides, the ladies held their own and kicked major wimpy guy ass!
Dishan and I did pretty good, and by pretty good I mean we didn’t get slayed and held on for a few minutes. My first match was with a dude in an orange prison shirt and a tear drop tattoo under his eye, which I somehow felt was fitting for me, but he wasn’t as tough as he looked.
“Ready… 1, 2, 3… Go!”
“Lisa, you have to do this” we pepped whipped wimp butt after wimp but, “You have to beat him.”
Lisa was focused.
“Put him in your pocket!” we screamed, “Over the top!”
Dishan got into trainer mode: “Breathe and remember, it’s all in your head. Stay focused and you will win.”
Ultimately, our champ Lisa lost to the the Bonecrusher who was the cockiest and most arrogant contestant of all. He also happened to have the best t-shirt he specially made for the occasion that read: ”
The real surprise was my amigo Don Miguel, who started off with a few easy matches, and advanced quickly along. When he sat down to take on Lisa, to get into the final match, he looked scared. “She is strong!”
He competes any chance he gets, which usually means late night drunken bouts with friends. Over New Year’s he said he broke a guys arm!
“I felt really bad, because he was a nice guy, but I broke someone’s arm! That’s cool.” It’s definitely cool. After all that he was a super nice guy and explained that “someone needs to be the villain, right?”
Photo Credit: Jon Pywell
Thanks so much Jen and thanks to Jon for the photos. You were a fierce competitor!!!
It’s interesting – training, talent or willpower makes more difference than gender, if a male person is not heavier than the female.
I was very surprised, when I lost to a woman who was much shorter, but heavier than me.
Interesting how small the difference between males and females is, when matched in a fair way.